Missed again

The girls are with Ex this weekend.
I knew that he was planning on taking them skiing this weekend, and This was to be Megan's first time. As I waved goodbye to them Friday evening, I begged Ex to take pictures and send them to me when they got back. I had hoped that it would make me feel a little better about missing another first in her life. When they called today, he apologized and said that he had forgotten his camera. I was so disappointed.
. I still haven't seen Ali ski, and this is her third year going. I feel guilty about it, especially when she jumped on the phone today and proudly announced that she's 'earned' her poles. She was so excited and proud of herself and so was I.
I would Love to see them up there on the slopes.
I would love to see their personalities shining through as they learn.. It's something that I envy about Ex..
he has the money, and the time to do those kinds of things. .
For us, it would be an expense we couldn't justify.
To take a day off work
,rent all the equipment (including our own because we both only own snowboards),
Then find and pay a babysitter for the baby boy. .
Its just something that we can't do. Someday hopefully, but right now. No.
.
... I shouldn't be so dramatic about it.. I'm glad that they get to go and do fun things every other weekend.
They're lucky they have that to share with him.
He's 'Disneyland Dad', and although I resent it sometimes,(especially when I think about the kind of 'Dad' he was when we were married!) at least he's a part of their lives and enjoys doing things with them.
someday the kids will Remember the 'other' things that We have done for them right?
the nightly snuggles....
the reading, the homework...
the Birthday parties...
Halloween costumes......
the fancy bedrooms...............................
It WILL matter to them someday right?
I hope so..


Ali three years ago on a ski day with Ex.. This is one of the only pictures I've seen of her skiing....

No TV day two

Day two.
I worked again today. I feel like I'm cheating.
I called to check in during lunch time and Taylor had caved! "only for a minute" he claimed, but I reprimanded him and they turned it off.

Ex came over and fixed my computer tonight (he's a computer specialist) . I called him last week and asked him to. I quite surprised myself when I did it, but was even more surprised when he agreed, and came happily to do it. He actually started working on it last Sunday after he dropped off the girls. Then when he brought the girls home tonight, he stayed.
it was the most cordial two hours we've spent in the same room in 5 years. If it could just stay like this for the next 20 years then we could raise these girls so much better. A combined effort from both sides works so much better than the friction and contention that's lived among us for so long. We had some interesting conversation, and he even sat in the same room as Taylor without incident.